Ya Might be a Redneck Addicted to computers if.....
Ya see the word "Zip" and know why you'z feelin' a draft.
If yer computer stand is made of a stack of old tires or 2 x 8's and cinderblocks.
Ya think www. in a url is a logo for a wrestlin' organization.
Someone tells ya he's "locked up" and ya ask if he needs bail money.
Ya've ever been too drunk to chat.
Ya think a harddrive is a trip to Uncle Bubba's.
Yer mouse keeps knocking over yer spitcan.
Ya think a surge suppressor is a pill for diarrhea.
Ya keep trying to figure out why yer scanner won't pick up police radio calls.
Ya think a megabyte is a new sandwich at McDonald's.
Ya have to ask someone how to spell
.
Yer stomach overlaps half of yer keyboard.
Ya try to figure out how to get yer empty beer cans into the recyclin' bin.
Ya try to turn on yer computer with the remote.
Ya find yerself on the floor looking into yer "A Drive," yelling 'Give it back! Give it Back.'
When birds fly across yer screen an ya reach for yer shotgun.
Ya put a mousetrap on yer desk
Yer yards full of ol' computers stacked on cinder blocks.
Ya call tech support an ask where ta buy stamps fer yer e-mail.
When ya turn yer computer on, ya say "Come OOOOOOON, Betsy."
Ya think ICQ is how smart yer computer is.
Someone tellz ya yer computer has a bug an ya reach for the can of Raid.
Ya go buy a surfboard to surf the net.
Ya think yer homepage is where ya really live.
Ya give Directions to a website that include a person, animal, or old barn.
Ya Think MB stands for "More Beer."
Ya wait fer the bluelight special at K-Mart ta buy yer 'puter.
Ya see the word Download and take the shells out of yer shotgun.
Ya think the person that made yer keyboard was dumb cuz the letters ain't in order.
Ya think pushing the delete key will make yer ol' lady disappear.
Ya think GIF stands fer "Goodie! It's Free!"
Ya see the "shift" key and try ta figure out how ta change gears.
Ya put a quilt over yer screen when ya make whoopee with yer ol' lady.
Ya wonder why yer screen saver ain't wearing a cape like that there superhero on the cartoons.
Ya think Geocities is a place ta buy lil cars.
Ya catch yerself tryin' to smell the li'l flower on yer ICQ contact list.
Ya think the "A drive" is where ya park yer pickup.
Yer 'puter has a bumper sticker on it.
Part of yer 'puter is held together with duct tape.
Ya sees the word "Refresh" and reach into the cooler fer another beer.
Ya's in a chat room, 'n' someone asks where yer from 'n' ya reply, "My momma."
Ya sees the word "Website" and start looking for spiders.
