i was begining to think that i was surrounded by aliens in here.
i am not actually sure if this says more about me or you lot though
Elfkura - I understand what you're saying, but I've grown up in an environment where I've never been touched very much, and that placed touch and physical closeness close to the top of my list. I've been held, been cuddled, been spoiled senseless by my boyfriend..... distance does matter, to me.
this is the first bit that really makes sence to me.
i cannot draw direct parallels, since i dont know enough about Elf to do so, and anyway, it wouldnt be apropriate even if i could.
however, this sounds a lot like me, except that i have gone the other way. having grown up feeling alone and surounded by alien strangers (people my own age), being physically close to people is something that i tend to dislike.
as a child i never got on with other children very well, but i always tended to get on with adults who would talk to me as a person, as oposed to treating me like a child.
so i have ended up "defining" the concept of a "relationship" purely in terms of a meeting of minds. and for such a meeting distance becomes irrelivent.
the parallel half of the process was that any form of "physical" interaction just never entered the equasion. just what you would expect under the circumstances.
when this is combined with my general nature, and complex views on the whole questions of gender and species, then simply sidestepping the whole physical question seems quite natural and easy
i dont know if the following thoughts are at all helpful or not Elf, but i offer them up anyway.
can you at least get the mental closeness via net and phone talks?
as for someone to cuddle, how about a large teddy bear? this isnt quite as silly as it sounds. or at least i find it helps.
i do hope that this works out somehow for you both.
