I'm so glad you put it that way... using the word "joys" in the same sentence as "not being quite right in the head" makes me feel a whole lot better about myself.... so much so I'll be able to spend less time in my strait jacket and padded cell.

Probably!   Being brain eaters, I'd imagine zombies would see vampires as real weirdos because their liquid lunches wouldn't be all that filling.

Vegans taste funny

is there a doctor in the house?

Doc puts his stethescope in the fridge. I sit in a recliner all day and sleep setting up in it all night, so I think my blood pools in my ass where my brain resides,or at least my wife thinks it does.  Therefore a zombie can bite my ass if he wants brains.  As for the vegans, well veggies are great smothered in MEAT.

 I used to think...USED to think...that when you got in the car to go some where you really didn't go anywhere at all.

You just drove around in a big circle while a bunch of people just rearanged and rebuilt everything.

When you got on a plane, it just gave them more time to rebuild.

No matter what, you always ended up back where you started. They just built new scenery.

And it was there fault when you couldn't find the car keys or something, cause they forgot to pt them back. That's why they're always where you knew you left them to begin with when you finally find them.

This would also mean that none of you are real. You all work for them. You're really just three people in a room about a mile from my house and it's your job to make me think there is a 'wide world internet'. But I know. I know everything. I know this planet is only the size of Texas and there really is nowhere to go and it's like only 11 or 17 of us on the whole planet.

AT least that's what I used to think. A long time ago. But not anymore.

Damn. Where's my lighter?

Hang upside down, just like a vampire ;

Ask skinhit.  Apparently it's not just a hobby, it's a fetish.

Vegans are just another breed of vampire. Instead of iron rich blood to suck up they like dining on Vulcans 'cause their blood is green. And zombies...no problem. Set some tripe out on the doorstep at night. They'll never know the difference. Make sure you defrost it first or there'll be a whole new meaning the word...brainfreeze.

When I was 5 we went on a trip once and we left before daylight to get to our destination earlier.

I thought we had drove so fast that we outran the suns progress across the state and thats why the sun came up.

which would be almost 1000 mile an hour.

I miss you so much, Ed. 

Barb...things are the way they are. Thanks for the email this morning. You're a really good person.

I never wanted anyone to know, but Ed wore socks like those.