Do you remember back in the day when we were blessed/cursed with proliferation of stretch pants? I do. It was a blessing because some really hot chicks would walk around with these things on, and they left very little to the imagination. And for a guy that hadn't explored the full glory of internet porn, this was a godsend.
This was a curse because people that had NO business wearing these pants were wedging their fat asses into these pants. You know what I'm talking about. The people that would stop walking, but it would take an extra 5 minutes for their fat to stop jiggling. But in all fairness it wasn't just the morbidly obese people that offended me, it was alot of people that just didn't have the thighs and ass to pull this off (I'm talking guys and girls here). The fact was, you really had to have a nice body to wear this crap.
But, as per my norm, I digress. Now-a-days there is another blessing/curse that is desending on our fair country (or at least on the campus of the University of Texas in Austin). The midi-shirt. The crop top. You've heard of it I'm sure.
This is another blessing in my opinion because even though there is, as my wife is fond of saying, a "hornets nest of porn" out on the internet, sometimes its just getting a peek that does it for me, and let me tell you, girls walking around with their bellies showing is a nice peek.
The curse comes in when girls wear these shirts when, sadly, they shouldn't be. The worst part about it is that there are really a large number of hot girls that shouldn't be wearing these shirts that do. From what I've seen, most of these girls suffer from something I like to call "poured-in-jeans syndrome." Unlike the stretch pants, jeans are a nice thing to wear very tight, for just about any woman. The bad part comes int with some of their, shall we call it, "imperfectsions" are squished up out of the pants gave hang over the edges of the pants. This wouldnt, usually be such a big deal, most guys look at 3 things on a girl, tits, ass, and thighs (with the odd face thrown in there if there is time). With this PIJ syndrome combined with the crop top, a guy doesn't have a chance, the eyes are immediately drawn to this bulging gut that is being forced out of the jeans and into the public eye.
I have been an eyewitness to PIJ syndrome. Being the dirty old man that I am, I spend quite a bit of time checking out my classmates, even though most of them hadn't devloped breasts when I graduated from high school. I've seen girls look stunning one day, and atrotious the next. All because of improper use of crop tops. Sometimes because of PIJ syndrome and sometimes just because they have stomachs that really just shouldnt be on display all day long. Not that they are nasty or anything, but they just arent at the level of perfection required to wear a crop top.
The thing people have to do is think to themselves, "if I wear this, how will it look?" Now normally I'm totally against giving a rats ass about what people think of me, or how I dress. I'm a shorts and a Tee shirt kinda guy, no matter what, but that doesn't mean I wear a spedo when I go to the beach. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY wants to see that. I realize this and, hence, dress appropriately.
I think the problem comes in when people think they look better than they really do. What I propose is that we have a two-tiered system. Tier one would seperate those that should under NO circumstances should wear these crop tops from those that possibly should wear them. Tier two would then seperate those that should wear the tops from those that may suffer from PIJ or just have some small flaw that disqualifies them.
Oh, and btw, I'll volunteer to judge tier two. I'm selfless like that.
