In the course of the last 27 years that I've been messin' 'round with songwriting/singing (that's the actual order of those two words used together), I've had the opportunity to make a few acceptance speaches at various awards shows. As often as I tried to write something up suitable for the occasion, something timely and meaningful, I always adlib once on the stage. If any of you are lucky enough to get to that point in your carreers, here are a few lines and ideas you all might use if you so choose.
1. (from the night In '82 at the Village Country Night Spectacular Awards Show, NYC) How the hell y'all doin'? Man, I've hears about places like this but I always thought people were bullshitin' me. Y'all are a bunch of homos, aren't you? Even the manager's one too, right? Well, I'm glad y'all like my music...glad y'all are into country and...western. Look, as nice lookin' as some of you fellas are..you really ought to be out findin' some sweet ol' gal to get serious with. If I could I'd like to leave you with this little song I wrote when I was 12 years old back in ol' Crossville, Tennessee. I hope it might turn y'all around and get you thinkin' right. I call it "SERIOUS LOVE", and it goes somethin like this;
SILLY, PHONEY AND FAKE... DON'T GO WITH LOVE
I FOUND OUT YOU GOT TO TAKE LOVE SERIOUSLY
I'M IN A ROOM FULL OFF PHONEYS ... I'M SNAKE/DOVE
I'LL BE VOTIN' REPUBLICAN..NOT AT ALL NERVOUSLY
HOW 'BOUT YOU...HOW 'BOUT YOU..HOW 'BOUT YOU?
SNAKE/DOVE I'M SNAKE/DOVE I'M SNAKE/DOVE.......HOW 'BOUT YOU?
2. (at the EXODUS SCHOOLBUS LOUNGE..at the Village, NYC '85) How you folks doin'. It's good to be back in New York City, where a man can be a man! Man, you all picked a cold night for this thing. Have y'all heard my song "SERIOUS LOVE"? If you'd let me I'd like to sing it to you now. No, on second thought, I'll just take my award and I know you can sing that song yourselves. Y'all don't need me to get you thinkin' straight. Just do the right thing, and look to God to keep you on the right track. Good night, Doctor Throckmartin, you dear and gentle man, wherever you are. The Lord be magnified. Our God is an awesome God.
3. (at the ex-You-Know -What Freedom Center in San Francisco, '91) Yeahh, yeahh, yeahh...thankyou thankyou thankyou. I'll take the award and run if you don't mind. I'm cool. No problemo..Thankyou and see you later. Thanky Thanky Thanky...you...and you ....and you too. Goodnight now, and all kiddin' aside, may God bless you real good.
