foreverserenity

Join Date 06/2004

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Verbal Diarrhea

What you should not say or share at work!

Rachel Zupek of Careerbuilder.com wrote an article entitled "13 Things not to Share with your Co-Workers". After reading it I must say she makes some very good points. I also realise how much of what she says does go on in and around offices I've worked in over the years.

Let's face it, for many of us wherever we work, you're there for a big chunk of your life. Do you realise that we spend most of our time with our co-workers? That's 40-60 or more hours per week, five times a week! For some people, it's six times per week! Wouldn't it be difficult for you to not get personal at work? Wouldn't it be hard for you to not have one person who you will share more than you should with? Somehow, we all end up learning about each others personal lives, whether we want to or not!

I give credit to the person who never lets their personal life get involved with work. I don't know how you do it but more power to you! For the rest of us who fall into the trap of letting some of our personal lives slip out into the office grapevine, there are just some things you shouldn't be telling your co-workers about.

Take for example one such person who exists in my work environment. We know everything about her, and I mean everything! Things some of us don't even want to know. It's very hard for this person not to say anything, it is how she is and it is in her personality! I t's become such an everyday occurrence that some of us have learned to shut off mentally when the griping and the whining starts! If she's having stomach problems, we all know. If her offspring experiences something in the male department, we all now about it! I wouldn't even know where to begin to tell you what we don't know!

In the article I read, Ms. Zupek noted that some people like to give very revealing details about themselves in order to create an illusion, an illusion of the life they want, or might not have. I think some people are guilty of this even out of the work place! She also mentions those who love to gossip; they do this because they think it brings them closer to the people around them. Really?!

How exactly do some people differentiate between business and friendship? Some people have trouble separating the two because they have to spend so much time together on a daily basis. There are some people you are drawn to and will share some information with. And there are those who you don't interact with except on a business level, no matter what. Regardless of what we may believe, at work you have to socialize, there's no hiding from it, unless you are really an anti-social person who doesn't participate in any of the office activities. But while we do have to socialize and be friendly to each other, we must not forget that we are in a place of business. This is what Ms. Zupek is reminding us about.

Another good point that was made in the article is for us to be careful of the image we create about ourselves. Who is to know if you weren't up for a promotion but lost out on it because of some story your boss heard about you? Or if you are one of those people who love to hang out at your neighbor's desk and chat the day away, that's definitely the wrong thing to do!

Did you know you shouldn't discuss how much money you make with your fellow co-workers? I've always heard this and have never done it. You would be surprise to know how many people do this very thing. Unless of course if your company has this information posted on it's website as a general information, then that's another story. Although some workers are lucky to make more than is publicly stated!

When was the last time you visited the doctor for a checkup? Yesterday? Really, you have a kidney infection, an STD, a...ugh? TMI!!!! That's right, your medical history should not be something you talk about either! Did you know you could be looked at as 'high-risk' by your employer, given the amount of complaints and ailments you have? We're not talking having the flu or a headache or even being under the weather, we're talking letting everyone know that you're on fertility treatment, your physical condition after your medical check up, stuff like that!

Gossip is number three on her list of things not to do. In my office If any one of us wants something to be known, we know exactly who to go to. By lunch time it will be all over the building! Cry shame, there seems to be one in every work place!

If you're unhappy with how hard you have to work, or if you're not being utilized in the way you think you should be and you keep on complaining about it, then you are headed for the exit door! The best thing to do is to have a one and one with the boss!

Did you spread the word about the big 46 inch HD TV you treated yourself to over the holidays and how much money you spent? The late-model car you just brought, the third one in a row and how much it cost you to have 'the works'? Or maybe you're wearing that new leather jacket and you have to brag how much it costs? Another no-no!

What else, you might wonder, is a no-no to talk or share too much information about? Your political or religious beliefs may be cause for alienation; any major event in your life that doesn't need to be shared unless you have to; an interesting point - what you say in your blog, being a very public thing and we're talking the Internet as you know already; racially charged jokes or comments; to name a few.

To read the entire article and see the full details, please go to: Link

The next time you feel a verbal diarrhea coming on, excuse yourself and get away from your co-worker!

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Really, really good article Serenity!

Truer words were never spoken, what ya don't want spread all over, keep to yourself!

This article applies to our private lives as well, our living arrangements for example. There's a grapevine here where I live and most of the stuff you talk about needs to be practiced in our daily lives period!

I think most of us have a need to share with someone, and work, unfortunately, is one route many take.

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I'd like to get away from people who have a tendency to verbal poo. There's a guy at work who does that, as fun as he is, it can be very tiring listening to all that useless info after a while.

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This article applies to our private lives as well, our living arrangements for example.

Yes, it does! Sometimes it is difficult to not let some things out though. If you are trying to build a rapport with some people, especially people you have to work very closely with. Then of course there's the "can you trust this person" with anything question!

Really, really good article Serenity!

Thx Trudy!

I'd like to get away from people who have a tendency to verbal poo.

I'm with you on this one! It's hard to get away from them though. They actually seek you out!

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I got this funny little pain in my side, which I can easily afford on MY salary, but after that party binge, I dont know if I am going to vote for Hillary or not, unless that boob of a boss does, but then I may not have time as I have SOooo much to do, unless that lush in the next cube stops drinking, but then my new multi zigabyte computer will help, if my wife is not in a frisky mood, since we are devout christians, but then maybe that divorce is not a bad idea......

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I am one of 'those' people who says very little about my private life at work, unless I'm asked a direct question. As for gossip, I don't partake and avoid it at all costs.

Great article, by the way.

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I usually don't share a damn thing with anyone lest it's extremely relevant to a conversation or a direct question. I don't like to talk about myself very much...don't mind listening, though. I don't have a tendency to gossip so I don't think I'd take advantage of any crazy personal information...not that I enjoy listening all of it...especially gross medical stuff.

Good article...some people need to learn to shut up in the workplace.

~Zoo

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! You get the picture!

I am one of 'those' people who says very little about my private life at work, unless I'm asked a direct question. As for gossip, I don't partake and avoid it at all costs.

Good on you! I have one co-worker who I'm close to so we talk to each other being working moms and all and I'm guilty of some telling, i.e., kids, behaviours, recipes, advice, mainly mommy stuff! Even then we are careful not to 'bend' each other's ear!

I don't have a tendency to gossip so I don't think I'd take advantage of any crazy personal information...not that I enjoy listening all of it...especially gross medical stuff.

Good for you and yuck on the gross stuff! I have a co-worker who will even describe what color their poo is, totally gross and inappropriate!

Great article, by the way.

Good article...some people need to learn to shut up in the workplace

Thx!

Rachel Zupek made some good points!

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