Tray arrow graphics do not need to be as tall as the taskbar(default image isnt)Shelby has some misinformed ideas about graphics...they DO NOT need to all be the same height.Content margins determine height of the taskbar irregardless of graphic size. Content margin descepancies CAN cause unexpected results.
I've made skins with a specific taskbar size in mind. I ran into a few sizing problems until I made each 'part' uniformed in height... maybe this will not work for you but always has in my case. You are right that content margins DO determine size, but the graphics 'overall' height itself plays its own part.... as I said, it has helped with problems I have experienced.
Maybe I should state I was shrinking the taskbar not enlarging it too

If nothing else is working you could at least give it a try.... do let us all know what does work