Attn: Sir Bichur

Since you don't have an e-mail this will have to post here!

Good Day,

As I do recall your comment with regard to your employer, I thought you just might find this jokey!

Toilet Use:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.
At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken.

After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category."

Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.

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Someone I used to work with said she worked in the telemarketing dept of a national chain. When they went to the restroom, they had to set an egg timer. I can't remember what happened if they went past the allotted 3 min, but just setting the timer is degrading

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WOW!

That's sad. The above quote came from MountainWings as a joke, but apparently there are places where employees are timed and it's no jokey.

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starkers

Join Date 05/2004

+1153

It wouldn't be a jokey to anyone with an illness/problem in that area, irritable bowel syndrome, etc, and needed more than 3 mins.

I find it hypocritical that the rank and file have restrictions imposed while management and execs can pretty much please themselves how long and when....

At one place I worked some years ago, my section manager would spend hours in the mens-room with a radio and form guide to keep tabs on his bets......yet if one of us employees was in there for a while, he'd loudly bang on the door and offer some snide remark, and if the person was still in there a minute or two later, he'd throw a bucket of water over the stall door.....only ever got me once......

Take a guess at what I got fired for

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Yo Dogs O' Fire.

Odd you should mention that. About 2 wks ago I was showing one of my fellow workers a 'Official' Memorandum on the very subject. I first acquired it in 1986, from someone else who first got it in 1982 (also the date of the memo).

When 1989 rolled around I decided it was time for them memo to resurface. Since it was outdated and contained small glitches such as verbiage, spelling errors, and paragraph structure I went to task with a typewriter, razor blade, and xerox.

The razor blade was for cut and paste since I didn't want to get in trouble with official headings. Things like 'Department of Internal Affairs' were preprinted on the forms so I used the blade to cut and paste and 'f' for Infernal. Those kind of touch ups. The xerox on light, then darken the copies got rid of the edge marks on the paste job.

All I had to do was keep a couple of copies for myself for future reference and leave couple at the copy machine which was also the one closest to the 2 Branch Chiefs' sectretaries. It was just after 4:30 am and I went home. When I came in that night at 6 I got to hear how dayshift went ballistic around 8 that morning.

Most the people outraged only read the first 2 paragraphs at most. The stupid, this is gotta be a joke stuff (yes a keycard, a timer, toilet paper retraction, door popping open, picture taken. it's all in that memo) didn't really start until the 5th paragraph.

From what I was told quite a few felt very foolish after running to the manager with a copy demanding to know what it was about. Most of the manager started laughing as soon as they saw it. They remembered it from few years back.

The ones really nailed by it were the 10 or so who banded together and rushed the union office demanding to file a grievance against the employer. From what I heard, the confusion topped when I changed the sign on the drinking fountain during my 3rd week of employment.

hmmm....it's been a while....thanks Dogs.

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