How to lose your car horn in 3 easy steps.

1) Let your wife and/or girlfriend drive your car.

2) Let her hit some invisible bumps.

3) Let her tell you what happened, her side of the story, and then wonder why the horn does not work when you turn on the alarm only to find out that the horn is missing.

Now you see that wasn't so hard now was it? Works everytime. At least for my wife.

Here's an extra lesson:

How to avoid invisible bumps.

Take the keys away from your wife and/or girlfriend.

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I would love to hear other stories about losing the horn of your car. This is a first for me. In a newer car anyways, not old cars.

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I've never heard of losing a horn.

However, when I was in high school my best friend drove a Ford Reliant with a sun roof. We'd take the glass out and put it in the trunk then I would hang out the top screaming at people on the "strip."

The car was white with a chrome stripe down both sides and around the fenders.

We loaded the car down with 11 people, YES ELEVEN...My girlfriend was laughing so hard she couldn't drive. So she let a guy we know do it. We ended up hanging out the sun roof, and chasing another friend on their moped.

The guy driving followed the moped down an alley that was too narrow for the entire car. The mirrors and all the chrome were ripped from both sides of her car. Completely stripped away and believe it or not, no damage to the car other than that.

When her mom gasped and asked what happened....my friend shrugged and said, "Thieves. It was sitting in Taco Bell's parking lot and someone stole the chrome and mirrors.

Sounds stupid? Well here's one better. Her mom believed it.

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#2 by Tova7
Thursday, March 02, 2006

that's some funny stuff. The things one can get away with with a white lie or 2.

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How to Lose Your CD Collection and Personal Information in 5 Easy Steps:

1) Spend most of your day off doing laundry at the laundromat. When you are finished, drive back to the apartment, take a load out, lock the doors and carry the laundry up two flights of stairs to your living quarters.

2) Ask your husband to retrieve the other load and hand him the keys.

3) Fold laundry in the apartment while he unlocks the car, takes out the laundry, and shuts the car door WITHOUT LOCKING IT WHILE THE CD CASE IS IN PLAIN SIGHT.

4) Get a call the next morning at 7 am from someone a few roads over, telling you that she found your checkbook in the street.

5) Run out to the car and discover that someone has stolen all your CDs, your walkman, and a bag of miscellaneous paperwork to include a book of unused checks.

Extra Lesson: How to Avoid Auto Thefts

Take the keys away from your husband.

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#4 by Texas Wahine
Thursday, March 02, 2006

LOL, good one. Too many steps though. And to think that I'm constantly watching my wife to make sure that doesn't happen either. I belive I have the female equilivent of a guy with bad habit. All she has to do is scratch her butt and fart out loud and I'm gonna have to question her gender.

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How to avoid all of the above: ride a bicycle.

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Your story reminds me of a cartoon I seen in some magazine.

There was a man and a woman standing next to a car parked in a driveway. The car had a big dent in it. In the bubble above the woman she was telling the guy how the car got dented. In the bubble above the man there was a bull sitting on a toilet.

btw .. I don't think it was "The New Yorker" I seen it in.

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